wife life // letters to the husband

adorable otter card from the Little Matters

i am a huge fan of snail mail. and by huge, i mean HUGE. i love checking the mail and seriously freak every time something fun comes our way!

when bruce & i first started dating we were long distance. that meant lots of notes and fun cards made there way from siloam springs, arkansas to fort collins, co. we then moved to camp to work for the summer and we continued our notes by pinning them up on the note board (because every camp has an encouragement/note board – am i right?!) then we were in the same city just at different houses but i still HAD to drop a letter in the mail every now and again – then we got married.

the letters stopped because (hello!) we live together and we both pay for the stamps and who really mails a letter to their own home … from home?!

the other day we were talking about love and life and understanding each other (this may or may not have been the result of a little tiff over miscommunication) and words of affirmation came up again. i know that bruce appreciates that and acts of service but i tend to give out of what i want to receive (physical touch and quality time – am i right?!) so sometimes all my goodwill never even reaches his heart.

i think that it is time to pick up letter writing again. maybe you do to. maybe the person you needs that letter is not sharing the same bed as you but maybe they are…

1. encouragement.
they need to know you have their back. yes husbands grow beards, drink dark beer, and are twice your size (this may apply to more husbands than just mine ;)) but they need to know that you will be their cheerleader even when they may be losing (gasp).

2. reassurance.
just like you need a little kiss on the cheek or a “i love you” as you walk out the door, he will feel your care for him when you sneak a letter in his lunch box, under the TV remote, or in the box of his favorite snack. not only does it say “i spent time to show you i care” but it also says “and i know you well enough to know exactly where you would find this card” for example : when i place cards i place it by the diet coke. there is NO WAY this kid will miss it!

3. intentionality.
when you make writing a letter to your husband a priority you spend time thinking & praying for him. you write words from your heart. you think about each word as you put it in ink on that card. you take the time to be intentional about your relationship.

a little gesture can go a long way. maybe your guy is not the note type – then figure out what his thing is. but i can also tell you what, someone you know and love needs a note. you can bless them greatly just by sending a little snail mail (the post office should pay me for this advertising!)

Author: Elizabeth Mayberry

  • great post Elizabeth! E and i used to write letters & emails all the time, but now living together, we don't anymore. so we bought a journal and we each write in it once a week and hide it for the other to find! it's a lot of fun 🙂 i think it's great that you're writing your hubby heartfelt letters! i love how you mention intentionality–that's the perfect word! it shows effort, consideration and affirmative action 🙂

    grace & love,

  • Love this! I miss writing little notes for my man! You've inspired me to write letters and notes for my boyfriend again. You're right though, handwritten is way better than a text! It just feels much more intentional and sweet for some reason 🙂

  • This is adorable! I've want to start a "letter journal" where my hubs and I can write little notes in a journal and hide it around the house.

  • Thanks for this reminder Beth! My husband THRIVES on words of affirmation. So love letters go a long way with building him up. I haven't written him one in a long time. I may have to get out my pen and paper and write him a little note.

  • writing letters also makes me slow down and think about all the things I take for granted. sometimes I forget how much my hubs does until I sit down with a pen

  • i think that many more people need to start writing letters to one another. it's such a great way to show that you care! we have started a journal that we pass back and forth with notes and letters of encouragement. i love it!

  • I love this!! It's so important to do little things to show our spouses that we love and appreciate them. Thanks for the great ideas. 🙂

  • I used to write notes, letters, and even draw pictures when we were dating a lot. Now, I still try to make him a card or write a note for special occasions, but it would be much better to do it just because! I know he's kept every single scrap of paper and sticky note I've written to him!